Crawling After Jesus


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I feel like our youngest daughter, Miss H. I am crawling after Jesus, but I will be walking soon.

Hey Family!

I wanted to take a moment to speak to you about this journey that we’re on and I titled this blog: “Crawling After Jesus.” In fact, I chose this picture of our youngest daughter, Hannah because this photo speaks to how I feel. You see, when our Father called me to write about racism, forgiveness, and his son Jesus who is the very definition of love, I googled every blogger, author, minister, and prophet, whoever said or wrote anything about this subject and I compared myself to them. (BIG MISTAKE!) There was no comparison. Other than Mrs., which I feel honored to have, I didn’t have a title before or after my name and I didn’t have a million followers. (Okay, let’s be honest. I barely have 150 friends on social media, so how would I ever get the word out about this? Lord knows, I get a stomachache every time I hear the words promotion or selling. If I have a choice between donating at my children’s school or fundraising, I would choose to donate any day of the week because I don’t want to be “that” person. I can’t be that person! I don’t know how to be that person. I mean, if I can’t say, “Would you like to buy some candy?” How will I be able to say, “Would you consider reading my blog about racial unity?” So, here I am! Feeling like Jesus was calling me into my purpose, but as far as I was concerned, I was just a baby crawling after Jesus while everyone else was running, hopping, skipping, speaking full sentences, and quoting scriptures. Oh, Father! I must have made a mistake. I mean, this is all so new to me. That must be it. I mean, how could a “baby” in Christ address issues that people have been fighting in this country for over 400 years?  

So there I was! Too scared to say, “no,” and too scared to say, “yes.” Then, I was led to read Matthew 9:35-10:1. It states, “Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field. Jesus called his twelve disciples to him and gave them authority to drive out impure spirits, and to heal every disease and sickness.”  Okay, let’s read that part again. “Jesus called his twelve disciples to him and gave them authority to drive out impure spirits, and to heal every disease and sickness.”  So what does this tell us? Well, it tells me that our Father can call me while I’m crawling after Him and He can also give me the authority to drive out impure spirits.

Racism is an impure spirit that prevents us from loving the way our Father intended. Our present and future brothers and sisters in Christ continue to be harassed by the enemy, and many still feel helpless. To be honest, there are times when I feel helpless myself and I don’t even want to talk about the times I’ve been harassed. So, yes! He called me, but He called all of us to the ministry of reconciliation, so of course I am not the only one. You aren’t the only one! Other people will write blogs, publish books, produce plays, write songs, preach and teach to draw our brothers and sisters closers to Christ because the harvest is plentiful but the laborers are still few. (Don’t take my word for it. Read 2 Corinthians 5:11-21 to learn more about the ministry of reconciliation NIV.)

Because of racism, stereotypes, and prejudices, I see nations against nations. I see a beautiful yet divided country. I see families torn apart. Friends and co-workers alienating one another because they can’t find common ground after the election results, protests, and racist social media posts. I see strangers passing strangers without so much as a hello because they’re driven by hate and fear. I see Christians moving uncomfortably in their seats if a pastor mentions racial injustice in the pulpit. I see pastors shying away from the subject because they don’t want to lose their congregants, and it’s all so overwhelming.

Racism is a “disease” that has the power to infect families and communities for generations. (The United States is a perfect example of that.) Of course, this problem is worldwide, and we would be wise to remember that! Of course, I do not have to tend to the entire field. I just have to take care of my 0.5 acre of land, and God will increase my territory if he sees fit. I don’t have to worry about “promoting” and “selling.” I don’t have to compare my number of social media “followers” with anyone else or feel like I’ve failed if no one “likes” or “shares” my content. It’s not my content. It belongs to the Father. He will lead people to my blog and he will lead people to purchase the play because I am here to fulfill the purpose he planned for me. Maybe some of you can relate. If so, be encouraged and encourage someone else along the way! If he called you while you were crawling after him, he will give you the authority to walk.

#Just think about it#

#Then, go to the Father and pray about it#

#Soul Searching with our Father#